I went through an embarrassing, shameful experience recently.
I found myself in a horrifying position. I went ahead and made an irrational and immature decision, riding the wave of my emotions and ‘feelings’ all the way to the dry, hot beach.
I had, from the beginning, allowed my close friends into the situation with me. Knowing my past and present struggles, we had discussed it for quite some time. They had warned me about rushing to conclusions. But I insisted, “This time is different”. As it always is.
What happened, in itself, is a different story for a different time. But what struck me hardest was something I didn’t expect. I have shared so many joys with these friends of mine, shared in some slight pain at times, but I never had to allow them to share in my embarrassments…my failures.
I was horrified to allow them in to my shame.
I was scared to admit that, hey, I was awfully wrong, and you guys were amazingly right. But why?
Friends speak of “being there for each other” all the time, and I’ve always been a subscriber to that cliché statement. Yet I’ve never had a friend knock on my door and cry beside me during their most shameful moments. And until last night, I never had either.
True brotherhood allows its members to be completely vulnerable with each other. It allows us to expose our real selves to one another, knowing and trusting we won’t be judged – only loved. Holding in all our hurts, doubts, confusion, and shame, and trying to sort it all out in our heads is like swimming underwater and blowing off each opportunity to rise to the surface and breathe – you’ll eventually drown.
When this true brotherhood is lived out, then life as it was meant to be lived seems to come into focus. Two souls, both hurting and patching each other together, slowly piecing together this map of life that only one Man in history has ever done correctly.
It’s love. It’s life. Anything short of it is a pure cover-up of how we’re meant to live.
“If you don’t tell at least one brother about your struggles, you literally become a burden on the back of this brotherhood.”
-- anonymous
all my love.
